QE May 14, 2017 Where will we go next after we achieve all that we want? [Min]

1. Leading question [Min] : Where will we go after we achieve all we want (at this moment) in our life?

My background for this question is that I have a Chinese supervisor. He immigrated in Australia in 1989. Now he is a professor in Uni. He is a typical successful migrant here. He came here with nothing, owns his own gorgeous house in Adelaide, has 2 lovely daughters, a well-paid job in university, high status and a good reputation...

Everything he has is all I'm chasing now. I'm trying so hard to graduate, to find a great job, to have beautiful children, to be a successful person. [But] I have never thought about what I'm going to do if I achieve everything.


Some underlying questions [from Thor] :

2. Have you always had the same ambitions?

3. If you had to choose between children and a ‘successful’ career, which would it be? Do you think this choice is false?

4. Your supervisor has culturally approved achievements: status, reputation, good job, house, children. Do you know of any downsides and regrets in his story? Most success stories come with an opportunity cost.

5. Many people have a mid-life crisis at about 40 when their ambitions seem to be achieved and they still feel dissatisfied (divorce is common at this time). Why do you think this happens?

6. Your education and professional work in a company have both been in very structured environments where tasks, problems and progress were clearly defined. What mental and practical adjustments would you have to make surviving as a free-lance contractor where nothing in the future was certain?

7. Can you see any potential conflicts with your partner if you grow in different directions, have different aims, encounter different opportunities etc ?

8. I “march to a different drum” from you. My main aim is to have an interesting life. Things like ‘a good job’, social status, money etc sometimes help, but sometimes they hinder having an interesting life, so I sacrifice them easily. My main tools are keeping a curious mind and maintaining good health. With a good body and mind, the future remains an adventure, even at 71 y.o. Yet most conventional people consider me a failure. Who is right?

9. Cultures differ very much in the way people feel they are a part of a family, or a local community, or a region, or a country, or some ethnic group, or some religious community .. and so on. Depending on the culture, many people get a sense of worth by contributing at some levels but don’t care about other levels. What level of involvement is important to you?

10. At 90, when you look back on your life, what do you think you might regret, and what do you think might leave you feeling satisfied about time well spent?


AfterSuccess Discussion Questions ©Thor May 2018

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